God's Will & Robert Frost

There is so much that I am thinking about these days. It's so hard to know God's will for my life. I have prayed and listened and tried to be still, but how do you know when it is His will, or merely mine? I don't know. I can say that I knew the moment I decided to leave Veritas was His will because of the perfect peace that I had surrounding my decision. I knew that Trinity was a God thing because of the incredible students who are a part of the ministry and the other teachers whom are on board with me. I knew that making the choice to be with Charlie is God's will because he's the perfect combination of everything I've looked for, wanted, asked for and needed.

And yet... there are still decisions in my life that I have to make and I find myself torn. Listen to one side, one person's thoughts or listen to myself. Or more accurately, AND listen to myself. Its a difficult task for me, because while God has spoken to me directly in the past, most of the time, hearing Him... well, I just can't distinguish between knowing His voice and recognizing my own intertwined.

Logically, I know that God is going to provide, in everything, because He is everything. And He takes care of His children, just as he has every day this year, provided for and loved on me. I also know that whatever decisions I make, that He will be at the heart of it, because God is first in my life.

It reminds me of the Robert Frost poem... "two roads diverged in a wood and I took the one less traveled by." We have roads we take, decisions, choices, paths... and I believe that God called me for a specific purpose. I believe that He called Trinity into existence, because there was/is something that needed to be done for His glory. I believe He uses us, gives us skills and knowledge that we wouldn't otherwise possess, but I also think that if we/I am afraid to take the chance, the leap, afraid to have the courage to walk through the open door, that the opportunity doesn't shrivel up and wither away, but that God will put someone else there to do His will, the job at hand, to stand firm against whatever satan might be preparing to throw their way.

It doesn't make knowing God's will for our lives any easier.

With Trinity, I took the road less traveled by. And that has made all the difference.